


"Paperwork"

by Emphysematous



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: "doing paperwork", Anal Sex, Blowjobs, Established Relationship, Fucking on a desk, Hartwin, Light BDSM, M/M, Road Head, clicker-training as a sex act, driving without a seatbelt, improper use of company time, men in lingerie, obeying hand signals, schoolboy kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-18
Updated: 2018-04-17
Packaged: 2018-12-31 10:12:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12130224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emphysematous/pseuds/Emphysematous
Summary: From 14.00 to 17.00 on Wednesday afternoons (missions allowing), Kingsman communications shut down to all non-essential messages so that agents have uninterrupted time to do the boring admin. Harry and Eggsy have found much more interesting ways to spend this time than just doing paperwork.1 - “Oh fuck off, Harr,” Eggsy dropped the pen onto the desk and folded his arms. “You’re giving me fuckinglines?”Harry stood behind him with his hands on Eggsy’s shoulders. He leaned close to whisper into his ear. “I’m giving you fuckinglinesEggsy.”2 - "You want to clicker-train me like a dog?""The Twiglets are going away until January, then?""Wait! I didn't say I didn't want to play..."3 - “Jesus Christ, Harry…” Eggsy groaned, shifting in the driver's seat, “...really?”“I tend to find being a passenger on long journeys makes me -bored stiff.”That did it. Eggsy fumbled with his flies one-handed, keeping his eyes on the road. “You are such a bad influence on me,”





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> From 14.00 to 17.00 on Wednesday afternoons (missions allowing), Kingsman communications shut down to all non-essential messages so that agents have uninterrupted time to do the boring admin. Harry and Eggsy have found much more interesting ways to spend this time than just doing paperwork.

It was 2pm on Wednesday afternoon. Eggsy stood at parade rest, arms folded neatly across the small of his back, eyes fixed on an original Conroy Maddox on the wall opposite - because  _ of course _ Harry had a painting of a pear hovering over a fish head in his office, apropos of nothing, it was just the kind of intellectual, surrealist wank he’d be into - trying not to smirk as Harry paced around him, inspecting his new bespoke suit in minute detail. An irritated frown flickered across Harry’s face and he reached into the inside pocket of his jacket to pull out a brown leather roll, which he opened to reveal a travel-sized gentleman’s grooming set. With intense concentration, Harry bent at the waist until his face was level with Eggsy’s wrist - and therefore his crotch - and carefully snipped free an errant thread from the second buttonhole of the jacket’s cuff. He tidied away his scissors and presented the offending cotton to Eggsy between finger and thumb.

“I shall be speaking with your tailor about this. Details are everything.”

Eggsy couldn’t quite contain the roll of his eyes. “Harry, it’s one thread out of millions-” he began but stopped when Harry sharply held up two fingers.  _ Be quiet. _ He earned a curt nod and the faintest twitch of a smile for his obedience.

“You turn out very nicely, Eggsy.” Harry ran his hands across Eggsy’s shoulders and straightened out his lapel. “Well done.” He stepped back again, taking in the whole view, from oxblood oxfords and matching belt to dove grey tie and pocket square. A glimmer caught his eye and he cocked his head. “Let me see that,” he lifted the sleeve of Eggsy’s jacket to get a better look at his shirt sleeve. His cufflinks were a circle, half red, half white, with a black centre. “What’s this?”

Eggsy grinned. “Pokeball, innit? Thought they was well tidy. They’re real silver, Harry! Proper legit.”

“Hmmn…” Harry didn’t seem convinced, but he made no objections - though Eggsy would have put money on finding ‘pokeyball’ in his google search history by tomorrow morning. With another tweak to the lay of his tie, Harry stepped away, settled himself onto the small sofa next to the bookcases, and made absolutely no effort to hide the hungry way his eyes tracked up and down Eggsy’s body. He took a breath and moistened his lips, then glanced to his right and poured himself a glass from a bottle of filtered water on the side table. 

The quick flick of two fingers to point at the floor seemed so incidental to what he was doing that Eggsy almost missed it. He hastily unbuttoned his jacket and wriggled out of it, letting it fall to the floor, then started to undo his tie.

Harry’s glass met the table with an abrupt thud and Eggsy glanced at him to see he was holding one finger up, his brows drawn low in displeasure. He stopped pulling at his tie and let his arms fall to his sides. “What?”

“What are you doing?” Harry’s voice was clipped and low. 

“I- You told me to strip! Didn’t you?” Eggsy frowned in confusion.

Harry sighed. “I signaled you to remove your clothing. And I expect you to do so in a manner befitting the quality of the garments in question. Not to ‘strip’ carelessly like some common prostitute in an Argos suit.” Harry had an incredible talent for being able to pronounce inverted commas. They dropped around the offending word like he was picking it up with tongs. He stood and went to retrieve the dropped jacket, draping it neatly over the back of his desk chair. 

Eggsy rolled his eyes. “Argos don’t sell suits, Harry.” 

“I don’t give a fuck, Eggsy.” Harry sat himself down again. Topped up his water. Took a sip. “Continue. With care, this time. And start with the shoes.”

Holding back an irritated sigh, Eggsy dropped to one knee and then the other to unlace his shoes. He set them neatly aside by the desk and tucked his socks into them, along with his watch and cufflinks. His tie and belt went over the jacket on the back of the chair, and his shirt was laid carefully over the top. 

Harry continued to sip at his water, one ankle resting on his knee, arm draped over the back of the sofa, just watching - with obvious satisfaction. He held up a finger. Eggsy stopped, barefoot and shirtless, flexing his chest muscles and grinning at the way Harry’s face momentarily slackened as he took in the smooth taut flesh. With a tiny shake, Harry snapped back to the moment. He raised his hand and an eyebrow. Eggsy nodded. 

The signals came fast upon each other. Four fingers.  _ Kneel. _ Beckon.  _ Come here.  _ Thumb towards the drinks cabinet.  _ Fetch me a drink _ . Open palm.  _ Present yourself.  _ Three fingers.  _ Sit. _ A fist.  _ Kiss me _ .  Eggsy grinned his way through them, ending with a laughing open-mouthed kiss that brought Harry’s hand to ruffle through his hair and hold him close. He kissed the tip of Eggsy’s nose. 

“Enough. You haven’t finished,” he gently pushed Eggsy off his lap with one final quick press of his lips and pointed to his previous position in the middle of the room. “I want to see what you bought.” He avoided Eggsy’s attempt to steal another kiss and shooed him away, rather less sternly than he’d intended. Eggsy sashayed across the carpet, swinging his hips to flex his arse inside his closely fitted trousers. 

“Took me all fucking day to find these, Harry,” he spoke over his shoulder, keeping his back to Harry while he unbuttoned his fly. “Do you have any idea how hard it is to find blue pants these days?”

“That’s why it was a challenge, Eggsy.” Harry was entirely unsympathetic. “If you could just nip to Superdrug and get some, it’d be far too easy.”

Eggsy stopped and turned incredulously. “Seriously?” Harry gazed coolly back at him. “Superdrug doesn’t sell underwear, Harry.”

Harry took another sip of his martini. “Again, you find me entirely without fucks, Eggsy.” His forefinger drew a circle in the air.  _ Turn around. _ “Continue.”

“You’re unbelievable sometimes…” Eggsy muttered with a grin, but did as he was told, turning his back again and dropping his trousers to his ankles without ceremony. “Tah dah!” he trilled triumphantly. “What’cha think, Harr?”

There was a muffled choke from behind him, and he smirked; that was the reaction he’d been hoping for. The four hours he’d spent trawling various lingerie departments last week had clearly paid off. Harry had sent him out to buy blue underwear - women’s - to wear for him today, and Eggsy was proud of what he’d found. Electric blue, made of some kind of shiny silky stuff, with pink ruffles, a heart-shaped pink lace window over his crack and sparkling pink stones spelling out ‘SPANK’ across the back, the whole thing attached with string ties at the sides.

He clasped his hands behind his head, jiggled his thighs and flexed his arse for good measure. There was a soft clink as Harry put his drink down and the creak of him standing up from the sofa. Eggsy swayed from side to side, enjoying winding Harry up. He could feel the steps of him approaching through the floorboards and held his arms out from his body slightly, ready for the embrace.

There was a resounding crack of leather against skin. 

Eggsy let out a full-throated yowl and almost headbutted the door from launching himself forward away from the assault on his backside. He rolled and spun into a defensive crouch, ready to counterattack the intruder. The room was empty, save for Harry glaring at him, flexing his belt. 

“What. The hell. Are  _ those _ ?” Harry growled, not a glimmer of playacting in his face. He looked genuinely furious. 

“My pants, Harry,” Eggsy gasped out, one hand reaching behind him to feel the heat of that stripe across his arsecheeks. “Jesus  _ fuck _ , what the fuck was that for?” He used the doorknob to haul himself to his feet, straightening up gingerly. “You proper belted me!”

Harry flexed the belt again, entirely unremorseful. “That was just a wake-up. I can ‘properly belt you’ if you want?” His lip curled in distaste as his gaze lowered to the polyester sheen of Eggsy’s chosen underwear. “What on  _ earth _ possessed you to bring such…  _ tackiness _ into this room?”

“Hey, these are Ann Summers!” Eggsy protested hotly. “They’re the actual stuff, and they cost me like fifteen quid, so you can shut your smug mouth about cheap!”

Harry leaned heavily on his desk, forcing himself to take a calming breath. “Ann Summers. Yes. I see. It shows.” Behind him, Eggsy folded his arms across his chest sulkily. Harry stared down at the walnut grain of his desk. “What also shows is that you’re wearing a monstrous synthetic fabric which is undoubtedly making you sweat and promoting the growth of microorganisms in the area. You’ve also picked two ghastly vivid colours which don’t suit your colouring. I’m not even going to mention the ruffles or the… the ‘motto’, apart from saying that both have been applied poorly, and would have been better not applied at all.”

Eggsy shifted uncomfortably. “Can we not talk about microorganisms in my area?”

“Synthetic fabrics trap moisture. Combined with the body heat and abundant sebum in the region--”

“I’m getting the impression you don’t like my pants, Harry!” Eggsy interrupted hastily. “So fine, look, I’ll take ‘em off.” He did so, kicking them at the wastepaper bin, where they landed in a shiny turquoise and pink heap on the floor. He stood naked in the sunlight streaming through the blinds and spread his arms. “Better?”

Harry straightened and turned to face him, with just a brief flicker of the eyes to take in the glorious sight of Eggsy’s nudity. There was a hint of a nod. “Haven’t you learned anything about… about  _ quality _ since you’ve been with m- with Kingsman? Cost does not equate with quality. You could have spent that same fifteen pounds and bought yourself two or three pairs of very nice… ‘panties’.” The word came awkwardly out his mouth and he knew it. Eggsy’s lips twitched in a tiny smirk. “Expense does not equal taste.” He opened a drawer and took out a leather bound notebook and a turned-walnut fountain pen, then pulled back the desk chair. ”Sit.”

With ill-grace, Eggsy sat at the desk. Harry handed him the pen and flicked through the notebook to its first blank page. “Write it down.”

“Write what down?” Eggsy fiddled with the pen, momentarily confused about how to open it until he realised that the lid screwed on. 

“Expense does not equal taste.” Harry stood next to him like a school master, exuding that kind of ‘it’s your own time you’re wasting’ patience that teachers develop a year or so into the job. Eggsy wrote. Harry watched. 

“That’s ‘expense’ with an S, not a C,” he corrected. Eggsy went to scribble it out, but Harry stopped him. “No, no. Write the sentence again.” A little huff of annoyance, but Eggsy did as he was told. 

Harry leaned forward to inspect his work. “And a sentence ends with…?” he prompted.

“A fucking full stop.” Eggsy applied one to the end of the sentence rather harder than necessary. The pen glooped ink onto the page. 

“No, Eggsy. If a job is worth doing, it’s worth doing properly. Write it again.”

“You’re killing me here, Harry,” Eggsy grumbled, and scrawled the sentence a third time. 

Harry tutted. “That’s very untidy, Eggsy. Do it nicely, now.”

Eggsy stared up at him in disbelief. “Seriously?” Harry just nodded. Shaking his head, Eggsy wrote out ‘Expense does not equal taste’ with exaggerated care yet again, finishing the sentence with a perfectly neat full stop. He pushed the notebook away from him. “Happy now?”

Harry picked it up to examine more closely. “It’ll do.” He placed it back in front of Eggsy. “And now that I know you can do it, I want it twenty more times. Best handwriting, please.”

“Oh fuck off, Harr,” Eggsy dropped the pen onto the desk and folded his arms. “You’re giving me fucking  _ lines _ ?”

Harry stood behind him with his hands on Eggsy’s shoulders. He leaned close to whisper into his ear. “I’m giving you fucking  _ lines _ Eggsy.” A finger down the back of Eggsy’s spine and down into the cleft between his buttocks. “And won’t you be happy when they’re done?”

Eggsy shifted in his seat, his interest piqued again. “Yeah?” he asked, the briefest tilt of his head to his crotch making his question clear. Harry winked. Eggsy’s face melted into his filthy grin. “Fine. Twenty lines, then,  _ Sir. _ ” He pulled his chair closer to the desk and set to work, acting the angelic student. 

“A controlled but loose grip, Eggsy,” Harry instructed, “keep your fingers relaxed; most of the motion comes from the wrist and the lower arm. You want to develop a smooth rhythmic style as a good foundation. The flourishes and tricks can be added later.” He glanced down. Eggsy was gawping at him. “Take your mind out of the gutter, boy. I’m teaching you how to use a pen properly.”

“A pen. Right.” Eggsy winked, then set to work in his notebook. 

Harry stepped back - the better to oversee and absolutely not because he’d almost physically twitched at the sight Eggsy’s tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth in concentration - and began to slowly pace the room, walking slow circuits around the desk. Eggsy barely glanced up at first, absorbed in doing a good job. Harry decided to test his concentration. 

It came as quite a shock when Eggsy paused to count how many lines he had left and glanced up to realise that at some point in the last few minutes, Harry had discarded his jacket, tie, shoes, socks and trousers, and was continuing to circle the room dressed only in his shirt and underwear. His squeak of surprise was illustrated by a large blotch of ink spattering across the page. 

“Fucking hell, Harr!” Eggsy twisted in his seat to watch as Harry walked behind him.

Harry slowly paced up to him and leaned to examine his work. “You were doing so well - and then you let yourself get distracted.”

“I ‘let myself’ get distracted, did I?” Eggsy scoffed. “Nothing to do with you prancing about in your pants, then?”

Harry actually managed to look affronted. “I was not ‘prancing’, thank you. I parade, or possibly strut. I may occasionally caper, I’ve been known to cavort and just possibly, after a certain amount - which will remain undisclosed - of sherry, I might even mince; but I do  _ not _ ‘prance’.”

“Sherry makes you mince, eh?” Eggsy nodded with a grin. “Good to know.”

Harry tapped the notebook with two fingers. “For that, you can start again. Twenty more.” He paced sedately to the window and stood with his hands behind his back. “Turn to a fresh page, please.”

“Oh, but  _ siiiiiiiiiir... _ ” Eggsy whined in his best schoolboy voice. “It’s not faaaaair!” He shoved the notebook away from him and slouched in his seat, folding his arms. “That pen is bloody stupid. Who writes with a fucking fountain pen any more, anyway? Are we in like, ninteen fifty or something? Gonna go on an adventure with spam sandwiches and ginger beer?” He huffed, flailing his arms. “I should be doing this on a laptop, sir! That’s a real modern life skill. Or a tablet, or using a fucking biro, at least!”

Harry had slowly returned to the desk during this tirade, his face stony and stern. Eggsy scowled up at him - a schoolboy in detention. “It’s bloody stupid, it is. I don’t need to use a fucking Victorian pen to be a good student. It’s doing my nut. It just makes a fucking mess everywhere and ruins what I’ve done.” 

He eyed Harry through thick eyelashes and licked his lips. “Siiiir….” he drawled, sitting up and leaning forward. Isn’t there… some  _ other _ way I can show you what a good student I am?” His gaze travelled blatantly down Harry’s body. He stood up, biting his lip. “Some way to show you how I can be a good boy?” He was in front of Harry now, edging him back against the desk. He trailed a finger down Harry’s chest, his stomach, his hips, his thigh… “I think you might find that I can be…  _ head _ boy material…” He stuck his tongue in his cheek and gestured with his hand, unmistakably mimicking a blowjob, his eyes big and beseeching. 

Harry actually squeaked.

In a flurry, Harry turned them both around and pinned Eggsy against the edge of the desk, holding his face and kissing him. "Mmph," he mumbled into Eggsy's mouth, and pulled away from the kiss enough to order breathlessly, "up. Up on it." Eggsy found himself part pushed, part lifted onto the desk, the notebook that he had so neatly written his lines into now flattened under his backside. Harry shoved down his underwear, kicked it heedlessly behind him and crawled on top of Eggsy, straddling him, kissing him. A mug of promotional ballpoint pens went crashing to the floor, unregarded. Sat over Eggsy's hips, Harry pushed himself upright and Eggsy reached for his shirt, fumbling with the bottom buttons, while Harry worked down them from the top. They both hauled his shirt off him, forcing his hands through the cuffs because  _ fuck _ cufflinks at a time like this. 

Harry pulled Eggsy up to kiss him again, and then reached behind himself and guided Eggsy's cock to press against his arsehole. He was slick and ready for it.    
  
"You filthy fuck," Eggsy groaned at him, "have you been lubed up this whole time? Fucking presumptuous, that is."   
  
"I may-" Harry closed his eyes for a moment as he sank his body down. "I may have allowed myself some degree of hopefulness, yes." He spread his legs a little, settling his weight onto Eggsy’s body. His fingertips dug into the flesh just above Eggsy’s hips. “Nothing wrong with being prepared, y’know.”

Eggsy smirked. “Yeah, you’re a proper Boy Scout, ain’tcha?” He let out a small yelp as Harry fell forward onto his hands on either side of his head, pinning him to the desk. Harry kissed him. Deep and urgent and leaving them both slightly breathless. 

“Shut up and fuck me, Eggsy.” Harry rolled his hips and slid himself up and down on Eggsy’s cock, then stilled, holding his weight on his knees so that Eggsy could rock up into him. “Ah, fuck, yes. Like that. Good boy….” he practically purred the last, eyes nearly closed, head dropping to rest in the crook of Eggsy’s neck. Eggsy built up a rhythm, encouraged by Harry’s little gasps and moans. Harry rutted his hips, fucking himself on Eggsy’s cock, his movements getting more and more emphatic and less controlled. 

Eggsy wrapped his arms around him, trying to keep him somewhat contained, as much as for the closeness and comfort. “Fuck’nell, Harr… calm down a bit, yeah?” The desk had started to squeak and Eggsy had had a few too many previous experiences with collapsing items of furniture to want to break this one.

“Balls to that.” Harry took over again, sitting up and and riding Eggsy’s body wildly, the desk creaking and starting to creep across the floor. “Christ Almighty, your cock feels good.” He shook his head, flinging beads of sweat across the room. “Why don’t we do this more often?”

Eggsy grinned up at him, reaching for his hands to steady him. Their fingers intertwined. “Because you like my nice tight arse too much, you old pervert.” He let go of one of Harry’s hands in favour of stroking at his cock and Harry nodded, hissing out a wordless encouragement, brushing his hair back out of his eyes. 

“Keep doing that; shit, yes.” He leaned down and kissed him again, one hand trapping Eggsy’s to the desk, the other gripping at Eggy’s elbow, making sure he didn’t let go of his cock as the change of position trapped it between their bodies. “Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me…” He was grinding hard against Eggsy and panting in rhythm with their movement. Eggsy buried his face against Harry’s shoulder and started to sink into the big build up with Harry wrapped so perfectly around him. 

Harry’s breathing turned into a low growl and he slowed to a stop, glaring down at Eggsy with what was hopefully only mock severity. “Come on,  _ fuck _ me! Put some effort in!”

“I am!” Eggsy protested, belatedly starting to thrust up into Harry again, holding onto his waist for leverage. He slipped out and swore. Harry reached back and guided him back in.

“You had your lazy come-face going. Like you do when you’re getting a Sunday morning blowjob.” Harry shuffled up onto his knees a little more, giving Eggsy more space to move under him. “I want more.”

“You wanna flip over so I can do you harder?” Eggsy asked a little breathlessly, hips working hard. He was trying to ignore the beginnings of an ache in his lower back.

“I want you to give me a damn good seeing to!” Harry arched his back, angling Eggy’s cock to where he wanted it. “Come on, Eggsy, is this all you’ve got?”

Eggsy grimaced, and redoubled his efforts. “Not my fault you’re an insatiable--”

“Put your knees up, get your feet under you and pound your sink estate prick into my public school arsehole, Eggsy!” Harry interrupted. He moved his hands to Eggsy’s shoulders, putting all his weight onto them and rocking back and forth on his cock. 

Eggsy’s legs flailed a little as he struggled to obey. He gripped Harry’s hips and thrust up into him as hard as he could, earning himself a surprised ‘ _ oomph’  _ from Harry, whose jaw dropped open in pleasure. “Yeah, that’s what a proper fucking is, you posh slaaaag…” he drawled the last word in true Cockney East-end style. “Like that? You wanna be speared on-” Harry clapped a hand over his mouth.

“If you’ve got breath to talk, you’re not doing me hard enough. Good god, I shouldn’t be able to form full sentences like this! I want you to fuck me senseless! Fuck me like you mean it! Make me---aahhh!” he ended in a wail as Eggsy gritted his teeth, grabbed at Harry’s thighs and jackhammered up into him like he was in a cheap porn film.

Harry babbled something incomprehensible and flopped down onto Eggsy’s chest, clinging to him while his backside was thoroughly pounded. He grunted, deep from the bottom of his chest and Eggsy quickly forced his hand back down between them to stroke Harry off through the final moments - he knew Harry’s noises by now. Another deep guttural groan and Harry’s thighs shook as he came into Eggsy’s hand. He dragged a shuddering breath and let it out in a sigh that took all the tension from his body, leaving him lax and heavy on top of Eggsy. 

Eggsy let his breathing slow back down to somewhere near a normal rate, his hips just rocking gently now, keeping himself hard. He dragged his hand out from between them and licked his fingers clean. Harry dragged another big sigh and nuzzled into his neck. “Dear god, that was good.” His hand trailed along Eggsy’s arm to link their fingers, Eggsy’s thumb rubbing over the back of Harry’s knuckle. They kissed and Harry blinked at tasting himself in Eggsy’s mouth; then pulled Eggsy’s hand to his lips and licked his palm. 

“Yeah?” Eggsy asked with more than a touch of relief. He grimaced as he worked his feet back off the edge of the desk, letting his knees drop back down. His stomach and thigh muscles were burning. Harry shifted with the movement and pushed himself back to sitting, peeling his sticky body away from Eggsy’s stomach and chest. He paused for a moment, and Eggsy felt him flex around his cock. 

“Are- did you…?” He rolled his hips experimentally, squeezing again.

Eggsy inhaled sharply, his cock perking up a little more now that he wasn’t distracted by being commanded so much. “No…” he replied. “Not yet, at least…”  

“Oh.” Harry actually blushed. For once in his life he actually seemed a little unsure of himself. He rocked himself back and forth a little, biting his lip. “Do you- I mean, what would you… like?”

Eggsy grinned at him. “What, the great Harry Hart has never come first or something?” He ran his nails lightly down Harry’s thighs. “You can keep doing that for a while, if you like.”

“Not often, no.” Harry rocked a little harder. “It’s good? Just this?” 

Eggsy snorted. “Fucking hell, Harry, of course it’s good. How could your arse around my cock not be good?” He shoved himself up onto his elbows and leaned his face forward for a kiss. Harry obliged, cradling Eggsy’s head in his hands and softly opening his mouth for Eggsy’s tongue to meet his own. He felt Eggy’s cock twitch inside him and he murmured into his mouth, surprised. Eggsy pulled back to grin at him. “You see what you do to me?” He shifted his weight onto his left arm to grab Harry around the hips with his right. “So come on, you old perv, fuck me like you mean it.”

“Old perv?” Harry was regaining his confidence. “You’re so impertinent.” He pulled himself nearly all the way off Eggsy’s cock, squeezed it tight at the tip and slid his body back down, watching Eggsy’s face. 

“Jesus fuck, Harr…” Eggsy groaned, falling back to lie flat on the desk again. “Is that that public school education I’m feeling?”

“That was university, actually.” Harry shifted to lie against his chest, kissing at the curve of his jaw. “ _ This _ was from school.” He wrapped his arms around Eggsy’s shoulders and held him tight and still, with just his hips rocking gently, so gently, up and down on his cock. “Dormitories. Had to be quiet.”

“Fuck, you never actually did shag in school, did you?” Eggsy groaned, images of a young Harry Hart surreptitiously thrusting up against a classmate while their roommates slept, flashing through his mind’s eye. 

Harry increased his pace a little, but still holding everything but his hips absolutely still. “Why? Does that interest you?” He lowered his voice to a barely-audible whisper. “Having to keep completely quiet? Risk of being caught?” 

“Fu--!” Eggsy started to moan out, but Harry shushed him with an urgent kiss.

“Quiet! They’ll hear!” he breathed into Eggsy’s ear, but his thrusting onto Eggsy’s cock got faster, more frenetic. The desk started its little squeak again and Eggsy let out a strained groan. The motion wasn’t as big and visual as the way Harry had ridden him before, but this kind of urgent secret rutting was really doing it for him. 

He held Harry tightly and hid his face in the curve of his shoulder. “Fuck, Harr, please… please!” he panted, screwing up his face in an effort to contain himself and keep quiet - not that there was any risk of actually being caught, but somehow the pretending made it so much better. 

“Shhhh!” Harry hushed him with a hand over his mouth and  _ oh fuck _ , there it was. Harry’s frenetic, stilted movement and the reality of being physically made to be quiet pushed buttons in Eggsy’s brain that he hadn’t known were there and he was coming, coming inside of Harry with only stifled gasps and and a shudder. Eggsy was not naturally silent at climax. 

“ _ Shit, _ Harry!” he gasped out, still in a whisper.

Harry flexed around him, stroking his hair and kissing at his jaw and neck until he softened and slipped out. Eggsy clung to him, wanting to feel every inch of his body pressed against his own. 

“God, that was beautiful, Eggsy.” Harry kissed him one more time, then reluctantly heaved himself up and awkwardly shuffle-climbed off both Eggsy and the desk. Eggsy’s come trailed down his inner thigh and he shifted his hips experimentally, feeling the slickness between his buttocks. 

Eggsy pushed himself up on his hands and sat on the edge of the desk, swinging his legs. “Wanna hand cleaning that up, Harr?” he licked his lips with a filthy grin and Harry gasped in mock shock.”

“How scandalously degenerate!” He tilted his head, obviously considering it. With reluctance, he glanced at the clock and shook his head. “Another time.” The alarm on his watch started beeping. “Put some bloody clothes on, Eggsy!” Harry hauled on his trousers - no underwear - and hastily untangled and climbed back into his shirt, swearing as he forced his hands through the cuffs - the buttonholes would be stretched. He glanced at Eggsy, still naked from the waist down and being far too slow at buttoning his shirt - then quickly snapped his head round to face the window just as Merlin reactivated the link to and from his glasses. 

“Right then gents, I’ll be expecting your reports and expenses uploaded shortly; thanks in advance. And Harry, I’m sending you some photos of Mr Lovett’s signature and handwriting samples. I’ll need you to practice to get them perfect for Monday - you’ll have to write the pass phrases there and then to get into the vault so there can be no hesitation. Smooth and flowing, remember. Write me the signature and each pass phrase twenty-odd times so that I can check you’ve got it down. And don’t forget it’s Lancelot’s birthday coming up - send in your contribution to the whip-round to the usual account. I’ll see you in the office in the morning for briefing on this ridiculous new idea from the PM - it’s gonna cause a shit-storm of protests, we need to be ready. Bye for now!”

As abruptly as he had begun, Merlin signed off. Harry chewed his lip thoughtfully, avoiding looking at Eggsy. “I suppose you think that’s funny, don’t you?”

Eggsy was almost doubled up in silent laughter, leaning on the back of the chair for support. “Ah mate! Twenty lines! That’s fucking karma, that is!”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Click

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2\. "You want to clicker-train me like a dog?"  
> "The Twiglets are going away until January, then?"  
> "Wait! I didn't say I didn't want to play..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For Threewick, who wanted more of Eggsy obeying Harry's hand signals. 
> 
> This is set earlier in time than the previous chapter, relatively early in their relationship.

It was 2pm on the Wednesday afternoon between Christmas and New Year and Eggsy was grumpy. 

“What exactly is the point of this? We’ve done nothing of significance since November, why do we still have to do the weekly admin shite?” He stomped into Harry’s study and dropped a party-sized bucket of Twiglets onto the desk. 

“Because we are paid to do the weekly admin ‘shite’,” Harry told him with bored indifference from the sofa where he already had a Martini in hand. “It’s just as much part of the job as the skydiving and shootouts. But mostly because I’ve already written the reports for this week and they’re just a couple of mouse-clicks away from being sent to Merlin, which gives us a few hours of guaranteed peace and quiet - and you’re  _ not _ going to open those, are you?” He glared pointedly at the bucket Eggsy was hugging and trying to get his nails under the edge of the lid. 

Eggsy looked up at him in bewilderment, yanking the top off. “Yeah, why?” He tutted at the plastic film that sealed the contents and scrabbled round the rim, trying to find the tab to open it. 

“Eggsy, you’ve done nothing but eat snacks for the last five days.” Harry crossed his legs. “By the new year you won’t be fitting into your suits. Kevlar blend is notoriously difficult to let out, you know.”

“It’s  _ christmas _ , Harry.” There was a satisfying rip of plastic as Eggsy finally got into the bucket. “The whole  _ point _ is to eat nothing but junk and grease for a week.” He wiggled his fingers over the Twiglets, selecting one to be his first victim.

Harry was on his feet and taking the tub away from him before he had a chance to realise what was happening. “No. You’ve had enough,” he admonished, lifting it up high and back so that Eggsy couldn’t reach. “You can have them back in the new year.”

“That is totally unfair, Harry!” Eggsy whined, “I’ve been looking forward to those for days and now they’re gonna go all stale.”

Harry snorted at him. “You say that like you were planning on eating the entire thing in one sitting!” He started to laugh but caught Eggsy’s awkward expression. “Oh surely not!” he said, turning the tub to examine its nutritional details. “That’s just…”

“ _ Christmas _ , Harry.” Eggsy reminded him, reaching to take the Twiglets from him. Harry snatched them back. 

“Oh no. If you want these, you can  _ earn _ them.” He stalked off back to his sofa, sat down and crossed his legs, Twiglets on his knee, lips twitching as he fought to contain a smirk. “I’ll give you tasks and reward you with snacks, how does that sound?”  His expression was bright, he had plans for this ‘paperwork’ session. Usually Harry’s Wednesday afternoon plans ended up with them both sweaty, out of breath and covered in come - just how Eggsy liked it. But today… 

Eggsy shifted from foot to foot. “Okay, so like, you know that I’m normally well up for this kinda thing Harry, but in the interests of full disclosure, if you try to get me to do star jumps or sit ups or anything too energetic, there’s a real chance that I’m gonna upchuck all over your carpet.”

Harry’s smile faded. “How much of a chance?”

“Put it this way: I had a Lindor reindeer for breakfast - for the last three days in a row.”

“Oh.” Harry came very close to pouting. “Hmmn,” he mused. “Okay. So I’ll set you a mental puzzle.” He reached into his inside pocket and took out a heavy ballpoint pen. He pressed the top, making a loud  _ click _ . “I’m thinking of you doing an action - a non-strenuous action,” he said slowly. “When you do it, you get a handful of… whatever these are,” he peered into the bucket with bemusement. 

“So I’m supposed to read your mind somehow?” Eggsy grumbled. 

“No no. I’ll give you clues.” Harry held up the pen. “When you do something along the right lines, I’ll give you a click to let you know that you’re heading in the right direction.” He clicked the top of the pen again. 

Eggsy stared at him. “That’s how we trained the dogs during the Lancelot trials. You want to clicker-train me like a dog?” He left a pause for the ridiculousness of the suggestion echo for a moment, then grinned. “You are so odd, Harry.”

Harry’s face pinkened as he let out a breath. “The Twiglets are going away until January, then?” He started to put the lid back on the tub. 

“Wait!” Eggsy held his hands up. “I didn’t say I didn’t want to play.” Damn Harry and his challenges, Eggsy could never resist. 

He rubbed his hands together, up to the task. “Right. So. I have to do an action…” He looked around the room for inspiration. Harry sat still and poker-faced, giving no hints. Eggsy turned around on the spot, watching Harry carefully for any reaction. There was nothing. He swung his arms back and forth and reached up over his head. Harry took a sip of his drink, but didn’t click the pen. Starting to feel a bit stupid, Eggsy stood on one foot and waved his leg around, then repeated with the other foot. Still nothing. 

At a bit of a loss, Eggsy walked around in a loose circle (nothing), and sat down at the desk chair (nothing). He was beginning to suspect Harry was winding him up. An action, he’d said. So It presumably involved a body movement… He began the stretching routine he did before any of Kingsman’s more physical lessons or practices. It was supposed to loosen up most of the sets of muscles so he hoped that  _ one _ of the stretches would come close to the action Harry was looking for and-- 

_ Click _ . 

Harry clicked just as Eggsy was working his glutes, quads and hamstrings with lunges. The small sound snapped sharply in the silence of the room, almost making him jump. Eggsy flushed with triumph and lunged again, earning himself another click. He grinned. “Do I win, then?” he asked, heading towards Harry to grab a Twiglet. 

“Oh no!” Harry held them close, curling his arm around the tub protectively. “You haven’t found the action yet, that was just a clue.”

Eggsy folded his arms. “Seriously?” Harry looked up at him and then slowly, deliberately, took a Twiglet and crunched down on it, chewing carefully. He gave Eggsy a benign smile. Eggsy stomped back to the middle of the room and dropped back into a lunge. “You’re a tosser sometimes, Harry,” he called back over his shoulder. Harry didn’t disagree.

Despite being in the exact same position as he’d been in when Harry had clicked before, going back to it now wasn’t getting the same result. Grumbling under his breath, Eggsy swapped legs in case he’d misremembered, but still no click. Confused, he looked over to Harry and swapped back, with no response. Harry raised an eyebrow in challenge. The goalposts were moving, he had to do more to earn another clue. 

It was ridiculous how much that small sound had triggered a surge of satisfaction and achievement through him. He was getting as much of a rush from a fucking ballpoint as he did when he beat a personal best or broke another marksmanship record. And knowing that Harry was almost certainly planning a reward beyond simply letting him have some more junk food was adding to his motivation, Eggsy could feel the warmth of excitement starting to coil in the depths of his belly, each small acknowledgement that he was on the right track bringing him closer to the prize. With his arms outstretched for balance, he exaggerated the pose, lunging further, stretching out the movement until his knee hit the ground. 

_ Click. _

He grinned broadly, but distracted by this minor success, Eggsy lost his balance and wobbled awkwardly, stumbling forward onto his knees. 

_ Click. _

Oh? Oh! Eggsy smirked to himself. So Harry wanted him on his knees, eh? He should have figured that out a lot sooner. He looked across at Harry to see if he’d won yet, but Harry was still watching him blandly, waiting for him to continue. He fell into a true ‘all fours’ position, wondering if Harry was leading him into a quick fuck on the carpet, but that wasn’t right, so he sat back on his heels, and then - after a pause to see if there’d be a click - straightened his hips and lifted up into an upright kneel. 

_ Click. _

Oh yes, now he knew where Harry was going. They’d done a bit of this kind of sub posturing before, but it didn’t tend to come up spontaneously very often. With a smirk of triumph, Eggsy clasped his hands behind his back and raised his chin to look dead ahead. 

_ Click. _

Harry stood up and - martini still in hand - paced around Eggsy in a steady circle, studying his form. Eggsy resisted the urge to watch him, holding still and looking ahead like he was supposed to. Hopefully. On the second pass, Harry stopped behind him and everything went quiet and still. He was waiting. Shit, something must be wrong. Eggsy tried to think of the last time Harry had put him in a proper submissive kneel. His toes were in line with his legs, not messily angled out to the sides, his pelvis and back were straight and he wasn’t hunching his shoulders or leaning back too far. His hands were… ah. 

Shuffling a little, Eggsy pushed his arms back further and crossed his forearms over the small of his back with his hands tidy and flat. 

_ Click. _

“ _ Good _ boy,” Harry said, with such warmth and pride that Eggsy felt a flash of pleasure pulse through him just at those simple words. Harry’s hand rested on his head and ruffled through his hair. “Such a good boy.” He tilted Eggsy’s head back and rewarded him with a soft, lingering kiss, lips wet with gin and just a hint of tongue before he pulled away and stood up, drawing Eggsy up as well with a firm hand on the back of his neck. 

“Pay attention.” Harry held a hand up, palm forward, four fingers up, thumb tucked in. He cocked his head and gave Eggsy an expectant look. Eggsy frowned blankly back at him for a moment before catching on and sliding back down into his kneel, remembering to place his arms properly this time. 

_ Click. _

“Oh, that is  _ lovely _ ,” Harry sighed at him, biting his lip as if he was forcing himself to resist pouncing him. He probably was. Eggsy was under no illusions about the effect it had on Harry if he did something as simple as stand at parade rest with his arms tucked neatly behind his back and called him ‘Sir’ in that particular tone of voice that left no doubt that the word had an initial capital.  _ Sir. _ He smiled to himself. Harry was proper into the protocol shit. Which was fine by Eggsy as it was easy as hell and usually led to a very very pleasant time for him shortly after. 

His obedience was rewarded with another kiss. Slightly harder this time, more heated. Harry was starting to fray around the edges of his perfect composure. Again, he was guided back up to his feet. Harry held up his hand again, balled into a fist - not a threatening fist, this was palm-first, simply another signal. This time he didn’t wait for Eggsy to try to figure out what he wanted, but took hold of him by the front of his shirt and pulled him in to kiss. As their lips met, from behind Harry’s back there came a small sound. 

_ Click. _

Harry stepped back and held up his fist again, eyes bright. Eggsy laughed and came forward to kiss him, grinning and wondering if the signal might go both ways. It’d be lovely to be able to ask for a kiss with just a raised hand. Harry raised four fingers, Eggsy dropped to his knees... and Harry virtually groaned aloud. He was definitely getting a bit cramped in the trouser area. Eggsy looked up at him through his lashes and licked his lips, playing the whore. To be fair, for Harry, it wasn’t much of an act.

“Oh stop that, you tart.” Harry nudged him with a toe, turning away to go and sit back on the sofa, composing himself. He poured a glass of water from the carafe on the side table. “You’ll be the death of me.”

Eggsy sat back on his heels and stretched his arms up over his head, making his shirt lift up to show off the trail of sparse hair leading down into his jeans. “Yeah, but… what a way to go, eh?” He winked, enjoying watching Harry struggle to control his face. Eggsy leaned back, resting his hands on his ankles, his posture casual but suggestive. He spread his knees slightly, making that suggestion just a bit clearer. 

For a moment, he thought that Harry was going to take the bait - drop the game they’d set up and just come and have him here and now. His cock twitched at the idea. Fucking hell, he’d been shagging the guy for a few months and already the combination of this room and Wednesday afternoon had given him a Pavlovian hard-on. That, and the way Harry was making no effort at all to hide his own erection. Unconsciously, Eggsy licked his lips, his imagination throwing him very vivid images of sucking Harry off from under the desk while he sent their weekly reports through to Kingsman. 

Harry sat straighter, elbows on knees. He pointed two fingers at Eggsy as if he was miming a gun and then bent his fingers to point at the floor. Eggsy frowned, not following what he meant by the gesture and Harry sat back, ballpoint pen prominently in hand, chin raised challengingly, waiting for him to being to figure it out. 

Eggsy clambered back up to his feet and then paused for a while, thinking. Harry was definitely hard, definitely up for escalating this game. They were well beyond the time they’d usually started to take their ‘paperwork’ in a far more frivolous direction. Although Eggsy couldn’t rule out that Harry would start down a different track entirely, it was far more likely that he’d want to keep the current sexually-charged atmosphere going. Which meant that… Experimentally, Eggsy took hold of the hem of his shirt and slowly lifted it up, showing off his abs. 

_ Click. _

Oh yes.  _ Hart, you are becoming predictable _ , Eggsy grinned to himself, continuing to lift his shirt until he’d stripped it off entirely. 

_ Click. _

Now of course, the only question was how far did Harry want him to go? Eggsy lowered his hands to the waistband of his jeans, watching Harry’s face as he slowly unbuttoned and dragged the zip down. Harry, to his credit, managed to maintain an entirely blank expression, although his hand did twitch around the pen. 

_ Click. _

Eggsy shook his jeans down his legs, kicking off his shoes inside them and then leaning down to quickly yank off his socks - he hated being in his pants and socks, it reminded him of PE day in primary school. Harry repeated the pointing at him/pointing at the floor gesture. Eggsy got the message: keep going. He stood square on facing Harry and dropped his boxers to the floor, kicking them aside and straightening up to give Harry a full eyeful of the goods. 

_ Click. _

Harry beckoned him closer and Eggsy obediently stepped towards him, standing at parade rest between his knees. A fist. Eggsy stooped to kiss him, hot and wet. Four fingers. He dropped to his knees, arms behind his back, face up and eyes wide and innocent. This time, the groan was definitely audible. 

“You have no idea how perfect you are,” Harry murmured at him, staring completely unselfconsiously at him, drinking him in. He tilted Eggsy’s chin up with one finger and kissed him, letting the palm of his other hand slide down Eggsy’s chest to rest low on his belly, just a fraction above where the head of his cock pressed, hard and leaking against his stomach. 

“Have I earned my Twiglets back?” Eggsy asked as Harry shifted his mouthing to his jaw and neck - this obviously being the most important thing to ascertain right at that moment. 

Harry’s chest shook in a snort of laughter. “Those, and any other terrible foodstuffs you have stashed away, you terrible, beautiful, devastating boy.” Harry shuffled to the edge of the sofa, making Eggsy lean back on his knees until Harry was crawling over him and he was almost lying on his back with his feet underneath him, trying to keep up with the kisses and soft bites and gentle hands stroking over his body. He couldn’t keep his balance with his arms trapped underneath him but Harry didn’t seem to mind when he abandoned his pose to pull him closer, tugging his shirt out from where it was neatly tucked into his trousers.

They were both on the floor now, Eggsy on his back with one knee up and the other awkwardly bent beneath him; Harry on all fours over him, one hand palming at his cock while the other combed through his hair, turning his face to the side so that he could bite at the curve of Eggsy’s jaw. He’d have another mark there tomorrow - Harry never seemed to be able to keep his bites soft enough not to leave a bruise. Or maybe Eggsy just bruised easily - he wasn’t sure, he’d never slept with anyone who enjoyed biting as much as Harry seemed to.

Eggsy tried to  work at the buttons of Harry’s shirt or the fastening of his trousers - anything to get the damn clothes off him, but Harry was crawling away, down his body to lap the tip of his tongue over the head of Eggsy’s cock and looked up at him with those  _ filthy _ eyes as he did so. He held that eye contact while he slowly lowered his mouth down, down, down around Eggsy’s cock, until the head was filling the back of his throat and his lips hit the roughness of trimmed hair at the base. Eggsy tossed his head back, bucking up into Harry’s mouth a fraction, bringing him to just the beginnings of gagging before he pulled off, swirling his tongue around the underside of the shaft all the way up until he was just delicately sucking at the tip. 

“How the fuck are you so good at that?” Eggsy panted out, looking down his body at Harry’s satisfied face nuzzling at his cock. It wasn’t like this was the first time Harry had sucked him off, but he had the incredible ability to make each time seem like the only one that mattered. Like  _ he _ was the only thing that mattered. It wasn’t just technique, it was the obvious pleasure Harry radiated through every moment. 

Before, Eggsy had often got the impression that partners viewed blowjobs as either a favour requiring repayment, or as a brief pitstop on the way to something else - but Harry… Harry seemed to  _ savour  _ every second he’d had Eggsy’s cock in his mouth or his tongue at his arsehole. He could play Eggsy’s body like a maestro at his instrument; have him spurting hot and fast in embarrassingly short minutes, or stretch it out for literal hours, bringing him up to the peak - but never  _ quite  _ over it - over and over and over again until Eggsy was a mess of sweat-sheened, loose limbs, aching muscles and throbbing desperation. And then, with the tip of one finger or a single, tiny lap of his tongue, send him surging into orgasm, like an avalanche triggered by one tiny, loose pebble.

Harry winked at him and dipped his head down again, making Eggsy completely lose any train of coherent thought he might have had. He certainly wasn’t stringing this one out. It wasn’t a rush to get him off before someone interrupted or they had to dash for a meeting - but at this pace… Eggsy ran his fingers through Harry’s hair, nudging him back just a touch. “Harry, you’re gonna make me come,” he croaked out, mouth unexpectedly dry. 

With an obscene slurp, Harry pulled off his cock and crawled up his body to kiss him, deep and full of tongue. “That’s precisely the point, darling,” he said with a twitch of eyebrow and a delicate dabbing at the corner of his mouth. And then he was dipping down again, shifting to kneel on the floor next to Eggsy, rather than on top of him, and swallowing the entire length of his cock back down and  _ fuck yes _ , that was good. A firm hand stroking him around the shaft and and a highly skilled tongue fluttering at the underside and those gorgeous brown eyes looking up at him, watching him sink into how good it was and… with a guttural moan, Eggsy was coming, filling Harry’s eager mouth. And somehow, in the midst of his climax, through Harry’s murmured encouragement and the blood pounding in his ears and his own ragged breathing, Eggsy managed to catch a small extra noise.

_ Click. _

  
  
  
  
  



	3. Driving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Jesus Christ, Harry…” Eggsy groaned, shifting in the driver's seat, “...really?”  
> “I tend to find being a passenger on long journeys makes me - _bored stiff_.”  
>  That did it. Eggsy fumbled with his flies one-handed, keeping his eyes on the road. “You are such a bad influence on me,”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was written for LelithSugar, who requested a flashfic of road head to try to help me get out of this fucking weiters' block. It got a bit longer than expected. (that's what _he_ said)
> 
> I'm really struggling to write at the moment, so if you have any quick ideas or scenes for very quick flash fics, I'd appreciate the motivation! Poke me on tumblr at still-the-seventh
> 
> This one might be cheating a smidge, as it's not set during official Paperwork time, but you'll forgive me, right?

It was 3am on Wednesday morning and Eggsy and Harry were driving across Germany. 

“Fucking hell, Harry….” Eggsy said for about the eighth time in two minutes. He shifted gear again, moving smoothly up into fifth and exhaled a sigh of pure satisfaction as the hum of the Vantage’s four-litre, V8 twin-turbo engine changed from a pressing minor to a powerful major key. They were cruising along at seventy five, the long expanse of German autobahn completely clear at this unearthly hour in the morning, and the road just stretched out for miles ahead, eventually disappearing into the horizon. Harry had driven the first couple of hundred miles, and they’d swapped over in Dortmund - Eggsy had been waiting hours to hit the open road. 

“It’s something else, isn’t it?” Harry murmured, watching Eggsy’s face as he experimentally put his foot down and nudged the speedo up to eighty, eighty five, ninety… He let out a laugh of amazement and eased up on the accelerator, coming back to the high seventies. 

“That wasn’t even top gear. Fucking  _ hell _ , Harry.” Eggsy flashed a broad grin at him, utterly in his element. When he’d been told that they’d be moving a car from Brussels to Prague - he’d thought they were being given make-work to keep them out of trouble while something else went down. But when it turned out the car in question was the new Aston Martin Vantage, which could do nought-to-sixty in 3.6 seconds and had a top speed of just shy of two hundred miles an hour… he was completely fine with it. 

“Enjoying yourself?” 

Eggsy snorted. “Are you kidding? This is amazing. This is possibly one of the best experiences of my life.”

“Best, eh?” Harry cocked his head. “So… you can’t think of  _ anything _ to make it better?”

Eggsy glanced at him, trying to figure out what he was getting at. “Can you?”

Harry shrugged. “Well, we’ve still got about four hundred and fifty miles to go. Driving for long periods of time can make people very…  _ tense. _ ” He paused, waiting for Eggsy to pick up the bait. Eggsy was baffled. Harry tried again. “Anything I could do to  _ relax _ you?” He put his hand on Eggsy’s knee and stroked deliberately up his thigh. “In this very,  _ very _ sexy car, with this incredibly clear road and hours and hours of boring driving still to do?” A squeeze at the top of Eggsy’s thigh, fingers pushing into the narrow space at his crotch. 

“Jesus Christ, Harry…” Eggsy groaned, shifting in his seat, “...really?”

Another shrug. “I tend to find being a passenger on long journeys makes me -  _ bored stiff _ .” A subtle adjustment of the lay of his suit trousers, emphasised his already-blatant meaning. Eggsy squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, processing. Harry took the opportunity to press his palm into his crotch again, finding the outline of Eggsy’s cock through the fabric. There was some definite interest.

“Fuck.” Eggsy looked at him. “Are you really...?”

“When else are you ever going to get the chance?” Harry said, sounding perfectly reasonable, as if he was discussing places to go for lunch. He licked his lips and very pointedly looked down at Eggsy’s lap. 

That did it. Eggsy fumbled with his flies one-handed. “You are such a bad influence on me,” he said - not without some justification. Harry simply smiled that serene smile of his and released his seatbelt, shuffling his limbs awkwardly to half-kneel in his seat, elbows resting on the leather-upholstered armrest between the seats. Eggsy shifted his grip on the steering wheel to hold it at the top in his left hand, his right arm resting on Harry’s shoulder. 

Harry tugged at Eggsy’s trousers, yanking them down as much as he could in the limited space, and reached into his underwear to draw out his cock, which was slowly thickening up. He wrapped practiced fingers around and drew the soft skin up and down over the head, just playing, warming up. Eggsy exhaled, still not quite believing he was going through with this. 

Torturously slowly, Harry teased him until he was fully hard, precome starting to wet his foreskin. Eggsy’s breathing was slow and shallow, eyes glued to the road. Harry looked up at him and slowly lowered his head, mouth open, inching closer and closer. The anticipation was too much and when Eggsy finally flicked his glance down to see how much further Harry had to move to actually get his mouth in contact, Harry locked eyes with him, drew his skin back and licked firmly right over the tip of his cock. 

Even though he’d known it was coming, Eggsy’s hips jerked and his foot twitched on the accelerator. The car lurched forward, pushing them both back against the seats, Harry sliding his lips all the way down Eggsy’s cock while he gripped at his thighs for support. “Fuck, fuck fuck…” Eggsy breathed, forcing himself to focus on his driving, despite Harry’s best efforts. The road was still blessedly clear, but he knew better than to take that for granted. The Aston Martin ate up the miles as they continued east, the dirty grey sky slowly warming to pale pink as dawn approached. 

Harry was getting into his stride now; head bobbing, cheeks hollowing on every upstroke, tongue swirling over the sensitive frenulum before every downstroke, firm fingers holding Eggsy’s balls and giving the softest little squeezes. Eggsy had grabbed a handful of his shirt and was gripping it like a lifeline, the weight of his arm holding Harry in place. And still the miles disappeared behind them, Eggsy relaxing into the car’s incredibly smooth ride while Harry performed his magic. 

A pause for breath - and to ease his jaw - and Harry let his hands take over while he peered over the dashboard, watching the countryside speed past them. A particularly well-placed twist of his wrist had Eggsy’s gasping aloud, and his foot slipping off the pedal. He over-corrected and accidentally stomped down on it, jerking the car forward, super-charged engine complaining with a high-pitched whine. 

Harry was thankfully still while Eggsy sorted himself out. “This car does have cruise control you know,” he said, a little reproachfully. “Just stick it at a reasonable speed and then all you have to do is steer.”

“It does?” Eggsy glanced down at the controls, trying to figure out what to press. 

“Hold on…” Harry reached over Eggsy’s lap into the driver’s door pocket and took out the car’s handbook. 

Eggsy started to laugh. “Oh my fuck… here I am, in the most expensive car anyone’s ever let me touch, with my knob out, while my boyfriend reads the bloody instruction manual.”

Harry pressed a button on the steering wheel. “There. Cruise control. Just nudge that up or down to adjust the speed.” 

Eggsy tentatively eased up on the accelerator, and grinned as the car maintained kits speed. “Fuck yes.” Harry immediately swallowed his cock again. “Shiiiit!” Eggsy grabbed at the back of his head. “Give a guy some warning!”

“Eggsy?” Harry asked, his voice quiet and serious.

“Yeah?”

I’m going to suck your cock.” Harry informed him, and then did just that. 

The next thirty or so miles passed in utter blissful perfection for Eggsy. The roads here were incredible, well maintained and beautifully smooth. The car was out of this world, and Harry… well… Harry was as spectacular as ever. Dawn was properly breaking and finally, Eggsy saw another vehicle on the road, a freight lorry that he overtook with oceans of space. By now, Harry was a mess of saliva, precome and sweat, working Eggsy’s cock with enthusiastic determination. For a moment, Eggsy fretted that the stress of driving would make him fail to come but he forced himself to push the thought aside. Orgasm or not, this was still definitely the best blowjob ever. 

They were nearing Leipzig when Eggsy knew it was going to happen. Harry was pressing up behind his balls with rhythmic little pulses, his tongue working at the head of his cock while his other hand pumped up and down the shaft. “Fuck yes, Harry…” he whispered, almost not daring to interrupt, “keep doing that. Shiiiit...” He twined his fingers into Harry’s hair and guided him slightly left, then held him in place, rocking hips to thrust his cock in and out of his mouth. His breathing was ragged now, sweat soaked through his shirt and it was torture to have to keep his eyes open and some part of his brain concentrating when all he wanted to do was fuck Harry’s face and-- 

He came abruptly - hot spurts filling Harry’s mouth and taking them both by surprise. Eggsy yelling incoherently out, and Harry spluttering a little before licking greedily at any trails that had escaped. 

Harry held him through the orgasm, no longer rubbing at his cock, but just applying firm pressure to chase those final few pulses of pleasure. He wiped at as much of Eggsy’s mess of a lap as he could with his shirtsleeve and tucked him back into his underwear - getting those trousers back up was going to have to wait until they stopped. 

Eggsy felt like he could almost hear the creak in Harry’s bones as he pushed himself stiffly back up to a normal sitting position and flexed his neck and shoulders. “Y’alright, love?”

“I think I’m going to need a hoist to get out of this damn car…” Harry grumbled, grimacing as he reached over his shoulder to put his seat belt back on. 

“I’ll make it up to you, babe.” Eggsy have his thigh a squeeze. 

Harry nodded. “Too bloody right you will.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hopefully this will become a series of lovely Wednesday afternoon PWPs. 
> 
> I very much welcome suggestions / requests / ideas!
> 
> Thank you for reading!


End file.
